(Seemingly!!) the only things you can do with $5 or less
A brief list of inexpensive snacks and activities - especially if you're in the Twin Cities, Minnesota!
The record is so beyond broken, it’s like broke broke brokey broke. And so are we - because we’re getting priced out of basically everything right now.
I will say I’m fortunate to not have to think about money all the time. I do not budget well (sorry 2 my husband who will read,) so it took me a while to feel What Is Happening in my wallet. But I’ve fully arrived.
I went to Whole Foods recently (ugh) and I paused to touch some very soft hot dog buns. I moved to place them in my basket when I noticed the price. Six hot dog buns for seven dollars. I put them right back. I’m having a lot of these experiences lately.
I’ve started a little list of things I can do for fun and intrigue that are not outlandishly expensive. I laughed to myself as I took a recent look at the list, realizing that some of the options border on pathetic – the ability to Spice Up Your Life more expensive than basically ever.
No one would or should look to me for budgeting tips, but these are a handful of small and good things that remain relatively accessible. Some hyper-local and some not, sort of drifting from valid recommendation to a place of a little more desperation.
Don’t forget about pudding.
I’m married to a person with very healthy food boundaries, and it is one of the oddest things to see in practice. My husband will stop eating with only a few bites of food left on his plate. And he outright rejects my requests to “help” me eat something if there’s only a small amount left and I don’t want to box it up or finish it myself.
I’m someone that subscribes to the knowingly illusory belief that a person has two stomachs – one for sweets and one for savories. And I’ve frequently “made room” for dessert, even if it means being briefly uncomfortable in my body. I just want to taste! Everything!
If there’s a dessert worth really prioritizing, it’s the butterscotch pudding from Brasa. Pudding is so often associated with childhood, but it is something that’s held up! The butterscotch pudding at Brasa comes in a perfect portion size (small but not too small), it has great flavor, and its whipped cream and toffee crumble toppings are a visual and textural delight. And it’s only $5.50!!1 It’s the perfect addition to any evening – whether you eat at the restaurant or pop over to grab an order to-go to remind yourself who you are after accidentally spending $9 on a clamshell of salad florals across the street (from the Brasa Grand Avenue location!) at The Golden Fig.
SHIRLEY TEMPLE AT THE ARMORY TONIGHT, QUEEN???
Since I have basically completely stopped drinking, I’ve saved a lot of money by not buying a gin and tonic at every concert I attend. But my mouth gets DRY. There’s nothing to sip as I fight for my life trying to shuffle to the perfect spot – not behind anyone too tall, not by anyone that seems like a collapse risk.2
In October, I saw Lorde at the Armory in Minneapolis and I made two splendid discoveries.
1) Just behind the railing at bar level is the best place to stand, a location I’d scoffed at in the past (sorry I thought it was for the weak.) It’s got the best vantage point and is best for those hoping to gesture OUT instead of UP while dancing (claustrophobes and me.)
And TWO) A (large!) Shirley Temple will only set you four dollars at the bar.
I bought two and “Escuseme scuseme sorry scuseme sorry escusemeescuseme”d my way through mean mugs back to the railing and had the time of my life. Lorde was a revelation, the Shirley Temple was a great choice, and I’ll never look back.
Actually you should eat at Costco.
Does everyone know that you don’t have to have a Costco membership to eat at the food court inside?
In order to shop, you have to have a membership. Your Costco card is scanned not only at the front entrance but at the register before payment is processed. BUT, it is always an option to walk in the “out” door of Costco, past the employees checking carts and receipts as customers are leaving, and order from the self-serve kiosk at the food court.3
Maybe some will read this and think “Why would someone even do that when you can get dinner……….anywhere else??” And I’ll address that here because the Costco food court has some real OFFERINGS.
I am a cheese pizza slice, Diet Coke, and a soft-serve-to-go kind of gal, but my husband prefers the hot dog combo. I know a lot of people really like that hot pocket chicken bake thing, but I don’t like it because I don’t like things that are bad. Anyway, food enough to feed a family at the Costco food court barely eeks over the five dollar mark.
I’m hesitant to say ‘Costco is a people-watching hotspot’ since sometimes ‘people watching’ is used as a euphemism for purely mean-spirted mocking (don’t get me wrong, I love snark), but it’s fun and almost relaxing to sit and eat just outside the chaotic bubble of those check out lanes! This is a lunch or dinner solution often overlooked!
Learn 2 love the game aisle at the thrift store!
Soft Earlobe will never be the place for board game slander.
I’ve been known to bring both GAMES (card, board, other) and a bully-adjacent/persuasive attitude to many social gatherings. I insist everyone tries playing a game, even for a short time. Most of the time a game DOES serve as social lubricant and is a total success, but I’ll admit sometimes it’s a flop.
But what gave games such an eye-roll-inducing reputation? Is it truly so childish to play games? Many short form videos on the web lead me to believe that people are upset by the prospect of learning rules to a new game, but is that really so bad?? I’m a firm believer that ANY gathering of three or more people can be improved by even a brief round of Game.
But not everyone has games! And they can quite the financial investment! A new box of Uno cards could set you back almost fifteen dollars and it hardly qualifies as fun. I just bought Six Second Scribbles at a Goodwill for less than five bucks! Me and my mom and my sister played it and laughed our dang heads near clean off. More recently, I nabbed Greedy Granny at a Savers for a few dollars and, though my son finds it humorous, we will probably re-donate it soon. There’s so little to lose, and SO MUCH TO GAIN.
Many of the donated games are brand new and not even opened! If they are, perhaps you’re repulsed by the idea of a used game. But a Clorox wipe should calm any of your concerns.
You can eat the flowers, actually.
If you’re not already, I would highly recommend foraging and eating flowers.
This requires a little caution. You shouldn’t eat dandelions from your neighbor with the almost pristine lawn. Those could be spritzed with actual weed killer. And you shouldn’t be plucking a tulip from a patch close to the sidewalk (dog pizz threat.) You need to rinse them, regardless!
But I’m being serious when I say that a handful of dandelion heads and a few petals pilfered can be the starting ingredients for a genuinely interesting snack.
Inspired by videos from @blackforager and @inthecottagegarden, last year I fried both dandelion heads and tulip petals I pilfered. And by pilfered, I mean I went out in the dead of night a week or so after peak tulip season and ‘sourced’ one petal from about seven flowers in my neighborhood. I should have planted my own tulips for this purpose this year, but I didn’t. So look for me on your Ring cameras, because I’m about to strike again.
Does this just prove that almost anything is good fried? I don’t know. But it makes me feel like a character in Little House on the Prairie. And there’s no time like now to establish new and fun springtime traditions.
I drizzled the fried dandelion heads with honey and dipped the fried tulip petals in a homemade tartar sauce. Both would pair well with a variety of condiments.
Receipt Game
This is my personal favorite way to kill time, especially while standing in line. And it’s even good for the environment.
Find a receipt. Ideally one that’s been littered. They are EVERYWHERE.
One person will play the receipt looker, and one will be the receipt guesser. So, choose those roles.
The receipt looker will look at the receipt and tell the guesser the location where the receipt was generated, the date on the receipt, and how many items were purchased.
The guesser must guess the total of all the items, to the best of their ability.
Price Is Right rules apply (must be under the price for full credit.) No matter what, it’s fun to use this to inspire conversation. Which is as fun and free as the Receipt Game.
Throw the receipt in the trash so it’s not gumming up the riverways or something.
HONORABLE MENTIONS that maybe just reveal that I only really frequent businesses that are very close to my house, but these are worth commuting for –
$2.50 ginger house salad from Osaka in Roseville. BONUS - They have a koi pond that always looks clean that you can visit while securing salad.
$4 crunch-dipped twist cone from Conny’s Creamy Cone (SEASONAL and it used to be cheaper, but this is the best soft serve a person can get outside of the Minnesota state fair season if you ask ME!) Go on a day that it’s raining to skip the long line.
$8 car wash from Midway Express. For a car wash, this place is quite regal in appearance. And it’s the fastest car wash I’ve ever had! It’s become a family tradition for me and my son to drive through and scream in glee and mock-terror the entire duration of the wash.
$2 cheddar and chive scone from Hampden Park Co-op - you MUST arrive early in the day to secure!!
When I think about the receipt game, sometimes I think about Squidward saying “Playing? With a reef blower?” because that is kind of the vibe. But, now more than ever, I am trying to have fun and be hopeful.
Sentiments like “find the small joys in life” sound so hollow and repetitive when I’m irritable. I wish it wasn’t so much e f f o r t. Indulging in the negativity is like eating a full bag of chips. Amazing while the crunching and grouching is happening but then arrives the stomachache. The bleck.
It’s worth it to prioritize a slice of something good in your day, to leave the house, to interact with another person. Even when staying inside and turning inward feel like the way to self-preserve.
I hope you’ll buy some pudding, play the receipt game with someone, or eat a tulip petal (RAW EVEN!) And I’ll hope you’ll share with me your little accessible joys.
Be kind to yourselves this week and always!
At the time I dreamed of writing a Twin Cities budget snack guide, it was $5 on Brasa’s menu, but EVERYONE HAS BEEN HIT RECENTLY.
Happening a lot lately - let’s discuss!!
Level 2 is walking around to try samples stationed around the store without a membership. Tacky, but I would do it.
Midway Express recently took down their big, beautiful “$8” flags and bumped the price to $9. Inflation indicator that cuts too close to home 💔
you always have the best board games! i’m gonna need to play the granny one before it’s released back into the wild please and thank you.
loved as always!